In a few years we’ll look back and identify 2018 as the year that set us on the track towards living the life we mean to live.
It’s the year that we became a family of 4, the year that a series of external pressures helped us to clarify our intentions to move away from London, the year that Birdie showed us all what a healthy and strong baby he really is. It’s the year that made me challenge some of my prejudices and beliefs about mothering, and made me realise (most clearly via Birdie’s illness, but also through my own resolve not to repeat the rock-bottom upset of returning to work after A was born) that now is the moment to shift my work towards supporting and inspiring families to raise children who will change the world. It’s the year that we definitely decided to home educate the boys for the foreseeable future.
It’s felt like a murky year with a few lights shining through the fog: the connections I’ve made with other amazing, like-minded mothers; the incredibly skilled and friendly doctors who cared for Birdie when he was ill; T and I collaborating on the new ideas we have for our family; taking Ray Dodd’s course on Finding your Space in Business and really finding the spark to leap into the unknown with my work. My word for 2018 was ‘steady’ which seems appropriate for someone navigating the foggy uncertainty that I felt for so much of the year. I’ve tried to keep an even keel and keep us all off the rocks.
I haven’t completely mapped out 2019 yet but I’m looking forward to a few things:
Pulling A out of nursery after Easter and officially starting to home educate - in a less rigidly systematic way than I had expected even a year ago
Moving out of London
Incorporating a mindfulness/meditation practice into my days, especially to reduce and challenge anxiety
Getting back on my bike
Launching my first e-course in the next couple of months and continuing to find ways to connect with other feminist mothers
Reframing my relationship with consumerism, especially buying things for the children that they don’t really need
Improving my nature drawing skills
Committing to a weekly ‘partners meeting’ with T (inspired by Hannah Bullivant’s January Book) to keep our goals and budget on track, and in lieu of any actual ‘dates’ while the boys still need so much care in the evenings
In the front of my mind is one of my favourite inspirational reminders: Things change for the better, and they change in the blink of an eye. I can’t wait to see what 2019 brings for us all.