Changing our Family Rhythm

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We've had a really solid family rhythm going for months now - something different on days I was at work/A was at school, days I was home, and weekends, but the same basic flow to each day. It took us over a month to start finding a new pattern to our days, and this is still ever-shifting as Birdie grows and is a bit stronger every day. We have scaled back our plans and expectations, revisiting again my motto for the first 4 or 5 months of A's life: "Lowered expectations". We have missed classes, cancelled play dates, eaten very boring food, and generally had a very slow and quiet time over the past 2 months. Some days A and I manage to have a lovely morning time full of reading, singing, art, and music - other mornings, he bounces on the trampoline while I feed the baby and that's that. We make it outside every day, but unless A's dad is home to take him further afield, we don't go any further than the garden. We have eaten a lot of burritos and sandwiches, but A has become very good at preparing himself a PB&J wrap. 

Now that we're slowly beginning to emerge from the most challenging period of having a newborn with feeding difficulties, we're attempting to re-establish some sort of family rhythm. Our schedule has shifted earlier in the day since we are now all waking up much earlier. A is normally up and about by 5 or 5:30am and we're all downstairs by 6 or 6:30. 

Things will change again in a month when A's school closes for the summer, but in the meantime I am trying for our days to look much like this:

Wake and A fixes himself breakfast while I express milk and feed the baby

Vigorous playtime outside or morning time inside with reading/singing/playing instruments - or a bit of both. Birdie also has some playtime with his wooden gym. 

Dressed and ready to go out to school/music/a cafe. If it's a cafe morning we take books and drawing projects with us, nature cards, or something similar. 

Leave the house! Although many days we choose not to leave the house - or attempt and fail to leave the house due to the baby's need for quiet, sleep, and/or milk. On these days we tend to do some baking since A likes to bake nearly as much as he likes going on adventures. 

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Return home to express milk and feed the baby. Lunch for A.

Quiet independent playtime inside or outside (or both) while I express milk and feed the baby. Birdie has another period of playtime. If A is going to choose work off his shelves, normally it happens now. 

Snack/reading time while I (you guessed it) express milk and feed the baby. 

More outside play!

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On days he's at school, I collect A around 3:30pm and he plays outside in the schoolyard with his friends until 4pm. He is very tired after school and normally feels quite upset at this point in the day, so he often goes straight outside to do something vigorous (normally bashing some bricks with a wooden hammer) to work out his feelings until dinner is ready at about 4:45. This is a very challenging point in our day - something I will write about soon - so we try to keep our after school afternoons/evenings very simple and regular. 

Dinner prep/very early dinner for all of us. Express milk and feed the baby.

Bath and bed for A. He normally gets read a chapter of a book before bed. We're currently reading the last of the "Henry" series by Beverly Cleary. 

Little Birdie's patterns are still emerging, and he is largely a happy baby who is willing to go along with A's schedule. Usually after A goes to bed, Birdie has a few rounds of milk and playing with his mobiles until he has a very short bath around 8:30pm and goes to bed. 

We are having so much more unstructured time at home than usual and really taking things slowly. This is a challenge for A - and for me as well most days - because he is very sociable and always wants to be going out of the house, making plans for his next activity, and involving me in his play. We're both used to taking off in the morning and having our plans develop during the day while we're out and about, and saying yes to adventures at the last minute. Instead of going out, I've stocked our bookshelves with a number of new books, made a mass quantity of bubble solution, and shuffled our work shelves around some. More of A's small world toys are downstairs now so that I can participate in the storytelling aspect of his play while feeding the baby, and I've packed up some of his work materials since I don't have the time to present new things to him at the moment. 

Once school finishes I expect we will have a shift to even slower days, which will be a real adjustment for A. I have plans to introduce the moveable alphabet and explore some new books around the seaside in advance of our summer holiday, and involve him in the packing process as we prepare to move house in August. 

Work shelves at almost 3.5 years and 7 months

Birdie's First 8 Weeks - Materials and Toys